Little Kid with a Big Heart

My little brother Shane had known Nana Alice, my mom’s friend’s mother-in-law, all his life. Nana Alice and Shane both were very passionate about sports in general and the Boston Red Sox’s in particular. They would spend hours on end watching games and talking stats. Over the years they became very close; Nana Alice treated Shane like a grandson and Shane saw her as another nana. Shane loved Nana Alice very much and when she passed not too long ago Shane said goodbye with a big and heavy heart. Shane is one of the most kind-hearted kids and that was clearly shown at that time.

Two years ago my mom got a heartbreaking call from her friend Darlene telling her that Nana Alice was getting worse and didn’t have much time left. She immediately thought of Shane and how devastated he would be. To her surprise though when she told him that Nana Alice was very sick and going to go to heaven he showed a great deal of maturity for someone his age. He was visibly shaken by the news but he kept his composure, as much as a ten year old could under the circumstances and he asked to go visit, knowing that he would be saying goodbye. My mom hesitated at first, he was so young and she wasn’t sure if could handle it at that age. But after speaking with Darlene they agreed that it would be fine and if things went terribly wrong they’d just pull him out of there.

So Shane made a card and the next day my mom took Shane over to say goodbye. Darlene warned my mom that Nana Alice had been out of it for the past 24 hours and was struggling to remember and recognize people. But to everyone’s surprise as soon as Shane walked in and said ‘Hi Nana Alice!’ she responded right away ‘My Shane!’

Shane went over to her gave her the card he had made her. It was covered with Boston sport logos and a special message inside. Nana Alice asked Darlene to read it aloud and afterwards requested that card get buried with her.

Shane made himself comfortable beside Nana Alice’s bed and started watching TV and updating her on recent sport news. After a little while my mom went up to check on them, Shane was sitting by her bed holding her hand watching the Sox game on TV. She then asked nana Alice if she had heard that the Bruins lost the Stanley cup? Shane’s head whipped around and glared at her while motioning her to stop talking. He frantically pulled my mom outside and said, ‘You don’t say that to someone who is dying!’ Surprised my mom apologized and went back down stairs. Shane stayed with nana Alice till mom said it was time to go.

Not long after mom heard that nana Alice had passed in her sleep.

Even now 2 years later Shane will be watching a great Sox game and will say something along the lines of, ‘Nana Alice would loved to see this’

Ditching Your Comfort Zone Once And For All.

Stepping out of your comfort zone and dealing with change and discomfort takes admirable courage and a lot easier said then done for most, including myself. I remember my mother telling that one of her favorite quotes or sayings went something along the lines of, ‘life begins when you step out of you comfort zone’. She had told me this after she survived cancer, filed of divorce, and was still struggling through an ugly custody case, all while continuing to raise and care for my three younger brothers and myself. I imagine those are not easy and simple to take on all at once, certainly far from comfortable. However, she gracefully and fearlessly faced everything life throw at her in those daunting four plus years. She got through those incredibly difficult struggles because she had the strength and courage to step out of her comfort zone. To fight back and stand her ground- even when she was unsure and uncomfortable, not hide and remain competent or even worse give up.

I have found that staying in you comfort zone is much easier sometimes, you become so comfortable and set in your ways, that just the thought of changing your routine or habits may seem close to impossible or just down right terrifying. But in my twenty years, I have come to recognize how important it is to leave your comfort zone because life truly doesn’t really begin till you do so. In the past five years I have done things I never would have seen myself doing before, as a freshman in high school. Looking back I made a lot of mistakes, but the positives out weigh the negatives by far. I have accomplished far more then I previously believed I could and by doing things that weren’t exactly in my comfort zone for example going to boarding school junior and senior year.

In order to grow and learn the tough lessons you have to learn by making your own mistakes there will be plenty of uncomfortable moments. By staying in your comfort zone, avoiding or fearing any discomfort and change, you may be unknowingly allowing amazing, life-changing experiences and opportunities to just past you by. Staying in your comfort zone creates mental boundaries and limits and prevents you from growing.

Recently I feel like I’ve been spending far too much time in my comfort zone and I really need to get the hell out of there. Just the thought of changing certain things in my life at the moment scares me half to death. I feel like it is time to do the things I have wanted to do but refrained from doing, due to the discomfort I’d feel.  Things like finally saying the things I have been to afraid to say, not backing down, not being afraid of rejection, running a 5k, maybe even skydiving! Now I think I’m strong enough and ready to break to just do it.

Just remember that the possibilities are endless and it’s amazing what one can accomplish when your willing to get out of your comfort zone and face things that make you feel awkward and uncomfortable.

Teachers I’ll NEVER Forget.

There are three teachers in particular I don’t know how I would have survived high school without and that’ll never forget.

High school was by far the most challenging experience of my life thus far. However, looking back I feel that it made me a stronger and more compassionate person after the fact. I learned a lot about myself and I made wonderful friendships and memories. I also had the opportunity and pleasure of meeting Mrs. Brady, Anitra and Paddy, three very special, genuine, and kindhearted people and amazing teachers, with admirable dedication to education and their students.

I remember going into freshmen year, the public high school was beyond intimidating and chaotic to me. I felt lost, confused, and panic-stricken walking through the halls. That public school was hell to me, a living nightmare. Mrs. Brandy was my skills teacher. She immediately felt like a calming presence to me and made me feel at ease. I feel like I practically lived in her classroom for the two years I spent there. Mrs. Brady saw how much I was struggling and was there for me. She always asked me what was up and listened to me when I needed to talk to someone. She could always tell when something was wrong and there usually was between my hating the school, my mothers breast cancer, and relationships. I knew I could always go to her with anything. I wouldn’t have been able to make it through the school day without going to Mrs. Brady’s room everyday, even if I didn’t have skills. In addition due to my high anxiety I feel like I was very unintentionally high- maintenance, like I avoided the cafeteria like it was the plague, I avoided the halls when between classes, I hated to walk in late-all because there were too many people or I was afraid id draw attention and people would look at me. I feel like she went above and beyond for me and is such a genuine, compassionate, and just all around down-to-earth and awesome person. I was incredibly lucky to have her by my side. Mrs. Brady helped me get through dark times in one piece, I’ll always be thankful for all she did for me.

Once I transferred things were looking up and I was doing a million times better. Though of course like any other high school student I had my fair share of issues still. It was at my boarding school that I meet Anitra and Paddy.

Anitra was my advisor at my boarding school for two years and I was so blessed to have met her and have her in my life still today. Anitra is one of the most sincere and beautiful people inside and outside; she doesn’t have a mean bone in her body. Anitra gave me a lot of guidance academically and personally. I feel like she understood me so well and could read me like a book sometimes. I could always talk to her about any worries, concerns or problem. Anitra was like a mom to me at boarding school and was always there. Anitra also got me into yoga, which I have been meaning to get back into, because I did find it really relaxing and it did help my anxiety. The meditation I struggled with but the poses and stretching was calming and lessened my stress. Another thing, I always really enjoyed writing, but it’s actually Anitra, who has a great blog, that really got me thinking of starting one myself…and I did.

Paddy is another teacher I’ll never forget. He taught me a lot a about life in general and helped me deal with my parents divorce. I remember going to Paddy countless times within the two year I spent at boarding school with some sort of dilemma and of course in high school really small minor problems seem like literally the end of the world to a teenage girl. Many guys aren’t comfortable or just don’t know how to deal with hysterical, crying teenage girls but Paddy always made me feel better, whether it was some silly boy drama, the divorce, or some ridiculously stupid thing I did, ect. Especially with the divorce I remember how upset I was, and still am with everything that happened. He always reminded me that none of it was my fault and it would be okay in the end. He was also a great male-role model/father figure which I feel like I was truly lacking at the time. I remember thinking why couldn’t my dad be like this and how Paddy would be a great dad someday. Paddy was always there to listen and help me, which I imagine wasn’t always easy with all my problems. He was easy to talk to and confide in. He also always had country music on – my favorite. Paddy also managed to make soccer somewhat fun for me and I’m not a sporty girl at all! I enjoyed the running and practices, games made me nervous because there were too many people watching- anxiety. I’m grateful and very lucky that he was there for me.

Mommy Job Description

I have the up most respect for most mothers, especially my mommy. My mother was a stay-at-home mom for the eighteen years, raising my three younger brothers and me. Looking back we were not easy kids to parent and we still have our moments. This is for my mommy, I love you and appreciate everything you have done for me and continue to do…

Mommy Job Description

Qualifications

–       Ability to multi task

–       PhD. in patience

–       Ability to love unconditionally

Hours

–       This position is a lifelong commitment, there’s no turning back or changing your mind. And quitting is not an option because you have a precious little person depending on you for absolutely everything!

–       Must to able and willing to be on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week – no exceptions (no nights, weekends, or holidays off, no vacations, no sick days, if your angry, stressed, just not in the mood- tough luck, get over it and power through the day, essentially you get no breaks)

–       Must be aware you are on call all night as well. A good night sleep will be rare – get used to sleepless nights.

Specific Duties

–       Children

• Feed children. At least 3 meals at day. They will want to snack throughout the day so you must keep the kitchen stocked with plenty of food, especially if there are teenage boys in the house. They will also want the unhealthiest food like cookies, ice cream, chocolate, chips, soda, and such.
• Must be aware that kids = germs, therefore you must have a high tolerance for things like diarrhea, pee, projectile vomit, boogers, snot, running noses, and other illnesses specified here.
• Be prepared for tantrums, meltdowns, and water works and respond appropriately
• Morning Routine: Wake up early, usually around 6AM so the kids get to school on time. Get the children out of bed, which can be extremely difficult because their typical response is to roll back over and go back to sleep as soon as you turn around – you might have to bribe them with Dunkin Donuts to get to school on time. Clothe the children. As they get older they will become more and more opinionated about what they wear. They will want to wear completely inappropriate outfits, for example they will think it’s perfectly acceptable to wear a T-shirt and athletic shorts to school in January. If you’re dealing with a teenage girl, allot extra time in the morning to be able to send her back upstairs to change out of the world’s shortest skirt, and still be on time.
• Be prepared for many inconveniences throughout your day. For example the school nurse calling and telling you that you must come pick said child up because they just got sick – completely disrupting any errands or plans you had previously had.
• Personal chauffer. Make sure you are early because the children are not patient and will not let you forget it if you are late.
• You are expected to be the playdate social secretary and birthday party planner
• You are the tooth fairy, Santa, and the Easter bunny. You are expected to keep this secret as long as you can.
• When they become angsty, rebellious teens and go through the phases every parent dreads, you must take on a whole new set of roles, these include and are not limited to: Teenage Dating Expert, DEA, Teen Sex Counselor, therapist – not that it will be easy for you to get them to open up to you, and eventually college application adviser,

–       Household: no one tells you this but you are actually the maid too and you’re sort-of expected to do most household tasks. These include the following: laundry, remove food stains, grass stains, and any other mystery stains, occasionally iron clothes, wash dishes, mopping, dusting, scrubbing toilets, vacuum, ect.

–       Pets: when you first got this pet everyone said they’d help take care of it. However, within a few weeks you’ll be expected to take on all those responsibilities too.

Salary

–       HA HA HA…

Benefits

–       Peace of mind that you raised good kids and set up a good foundation for them

–       Your kids returning you unconditional love